Tuesday, June 20, 2006
      ( 8:05 PM ) Rebecca  
Damn, I can sure write one sad blog entry, can't I? I write like a mo' fo' when I'm sad. UNFORTUNATELY.

Is this why I constantly seek out hot but inappropriate men? Or, as I've called them here before, HBIBS? Because in the end, all I want is to feel pain and channel it into my Art?

Lord only knows.

At least I was adored for a full six months - an eternity in BB time - or six months minus however long ago it was he fell for someone else. I think it was the exact moment I wrote on my blog that I was "happy." That my love life was going "well." (Believe me, I'll never do THAT again).

Yeah, so the future started to open up for me just a little, and bam - it slammed shut again.

I was just deluded. It happens all the time.

But it was nice to be adored for that amount of time. I get easily carried away by the adoration of sexy men. I lose sight of what's best or what's wise and I live only for that next adoring gesture.

Adoration is one reason I became so addicted to blogging, and one reason I am so loving being an author right now. Because I am getting a lot of LOVE, in capital letters, from my readers. (Oh please keep sending it!) Here are just a few of the comments I've gotten:

"Hi, I just wanted to let you know that I finished reading your book and LOVED it."

"What a GREAT joy to read!"

"hell girl! i loved your book!...it came at a very opportune time in my life. it's helping me figure out what the hell to do with a relationship i am currently in. word!"

"you are a terrific writer and I love your book!"

"it's a beautiful book, and so unlike a lot of those chick-litty books, (which I do love most of them, but some... ewww) yours felt so real to me, with none of the fake shit to try and get a laugh out of the reader. THe laughs I had during BB were pure and glad ones, completely believable of the story. That's the sign of an amazing writer!"

"I read it straight through to the Hemingwayesque last line & enjoyed it very much."

Thank you thank you thank you. My life is one bittersweet mixed up mess right now. But just keep adoring me and I'll be OK.

OH! And did I mention? As a teaser for my oh-so-brief appearance on Fox's "More Good Day Oregon," they kept showing my author photo again and again and AGAIN?

Jesus. A narcissist could get used to this.

Good thing the attention will be short-lived and I'll fade into obscurity soon or else I could get really full of myself. And my comments are turned off so you can't tell me how full of myself I already am - ha ha ha!

xo,
BB
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Photo by Bradley Hanson

This blog was the inspiration for my novel. It helped me get through a horrible breakup and kept me entertained for years. But all good things must come to an end. I will recycle oldies but goodies from the archives here, but will blog about about writing here, and about all kinds of other stuff here.

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