Saturday, August 20, 2005
( 3:15 PM ) Rebecca
I yet live! I have returned from my biking vacation on the Canadian Gulf Islands, tanner and fitter after battling precipitious hills, massive banana slugs, and the many demons that are trying to take control of me now that I have temporarily sworn off the little pink pills and compulsive dating.
I almost ran off with 60-something yacht owner named "Cap'n Pinky" then came to my senses. We'll save that one for "Breakup Babe: The Nursing Home Years!"
Meanwhile, it's back to working on the revisions of my book and holding my breath til summer turns to fall and the light gets golden again.
Not that I don't try to love *every single day* that I am above the ground, mind you, and I wouldn't want to rush time forward, but still. Summer is hard work for me. It's hard to be a sensitive, melancholy artiste when the sun shines down and the pasty Seattleites all crawl out of their holes to revel in that strange thing known as light.
I do seem to be in a mourning period of sorts, having to do with 1)a cumulation of breakups 2)fulfilling my biggest childhood dream and 3)realizing I am now, actually, an adult - and not such a young one at that. I dreamt about my dad three nights in a row - a sure sign that I am sad and grieving.
But still, I'm doing my best. Look at me - going on vacation! Biking around in the sun! Jumping in the lake in my bike clothes! Eating ice cream! It's a tough job but someone's got to do it. And one day soon I'll be through this bittersweet little moment and ready for the next one.
Oh yeah, and one day very soon I'll be a published novelist. If only Dad could see me now.
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