Thursday, July 14, 2005
( 7:55 AM ) Rebecca
So nice of you all to write and BEG me not to leave. BB likes begging!
But seriously, I'm in a pickle. Ever since I lost my anonymity, this blog just hasn't been the same. For one, I can't dish as nastily as I used to, which is probably a good thing. And even when I don't dish, I still dish. Witness the Celebrity. I swore up and down I wouldn't write about him and I still did. Just in a half-a*ssed sort of way.
So now, all my future husbands can log on read and about my fast times with the Celeb (lite on details as they may be), and get themselves all tied up in a knot. At least now that I've hidden my archives, you can only get about one boyfriend deep, but it's enough to make a lot of men think twice.
The problem is, I'm seriously addicted to writing about my love life. Hell, I've been doing it since I was thirteen years old, it's just that up until three years ago, I was doing it in a journal, which now seems impossibly staid and boring. I mean, what would I do without the Greek chorus (that is, you?) to comment on every little thing?
(For the record, I did not have a love life at age thirteen. My entries went something like this: "Oh my God, Mike Robinson looked sooo cute in those white carpenter pants he wore. It would be toto cool if he asked me to dance at the dance on Friday night!)
I also seem to be addicted to having a crazy love life as much as I'm addicted to writing about it. I could chalk some of it up to bad luck and bad choices, but I think there's some secret part of me that is deathly afraid to settle down. I now associate "settling down" with betrayal. Also, for the first time in my life I have a stable job and a mortgage and a book to write so that kind of limits me in the adventures I can have - so voila - I find my adventures in the dating realm!
Since this blog seems to be a key part of my addiction - date, write, date, write - I figure that silencing BB for a while might help. But she really does not want to be silenced!
I figure all dating blogs are meant to self-destruct, though. Dating is supposed to help you find love, and once you find love, you don't need a dating blog anymore, right? In the meantime, you play a dangerous game when you write about people without them knowing it. Or you try, unsucessfully, like me, to be open about your dating blog and still keep it lots of fun. But what guy (or girl) is gonna say sure - go ahead and write about all the stuff that's f*cking lame about me!
So my plan of the moment is to start another blog, where I don't write about dating. But I just write about stuff. I'm gonna start it someplace brand new and once I've got it established, I'll tell you about it. This is not the final Breakup Babe entry, but I'm getting close. I swear it.
Must. Stop. The. Addiction.
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