Monday, December 20, 2004
      ( 1:42 PM ) Rebecca  
I have the holiday doldrums! Yes, moi, for whom everything is going perfectly. You know, the one with the book contract, hot men wooing me with lavish gifts, and a sleek condo with views of the Puget Sound!

Not only that, I have this entire week off - paid! I am wearing an adorable pink blazer purchased with discretionary income from my generous salary, and am a size 4 (even a size 2, if I shop at Banana Republic)!

My life rocks.

Why, then, pray tell, do I feel like a gelatinous, jellyfish-like blob? (Despite being pumped to the gills with Happy Pills?)

The chaos, I believe, is getting to me. The change. The upheaval. All good, of course, or mostly: but my God. On the same day, one month ago, my condo closed and my book deal went through. Suddenly I had a mortgage and a deadline. A(nother) new relationship had just lifted off the runway for the most dangerous part of its flight.

And now? I'm just seasick on this sea of change, waiting to get my legs. Waiting for a moment again when I can appreciate my good fortune rather than feeling like I'm about to vomit.

With that, happy holidays, all! I'll be gone from December 23rd through December 28th (and much longer, of course, if my plane crashes), so posting even less than usual.

xo
BB
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