Wednesday, June 25, 2003
( 9:40 AM ) Rebecca
Ah yes, I have rejoined the land of the living once again.
Only briefly, perhaps. But in those brief moments, I remembered how good, how natural, how human, it felt to—well, you know. To do that thing I hadn't done in way too long.
So long, in fact, that it was not humanly possible for me to not do it anymore and I did it with someone I hardly knew, despite my (quite successful) efforts at improvement in that arena this year.
But my, what a relief to lie down in a bed with a boy (my patented maneuver is to wheel the TV into my bedroom and say, oh-so-casually, “Let’s watch the movie in in here, shall we?”), and have him leap lithely into action, throwing me hither and thither with wild abandon.
Natural? Yes. This is the natural way with boys and girls, which is why you understand my despair last week at the fact that Charming but Goofy Lawyer Boy, when lying in a bed with moi (as he has on several occasions), just LAY THERE LEADENLY.
The man, I’ve concluded, though adorable and sweet (if rather wussy), and the first and only Breakup Babe suitor to embrace the “R” word, has no freakin’ sex drive. Maybe it’s his age (35). Maybe it’s the fact that he’s so emotionally drained by his public defender job, he has nothing left for the bedroom.
But whatever. I can’t handle it. My attraction to the Prospect of the Year has drained away. And can I help it if that sexy, sarcastic Indie Rock Dad stepped in just as my frustration had reached record levels, and reminded me that I am not some kind of h*rny freak, that there are some people out there who are even more passionate and h*rny than ME?
Indie Rock Dad (29), since I am quite attracted to him, is naturally NOT a great prospect. Let's just say this: Divorce = Emotional Luggage. He is, however, a very nice and communicative boy, who, despite freaking out initially (long story), has calmed down and expressed the desire to hang out more. So there is hope, however faint.
Hope is a false god when it comes to men, I know. But I will see how things go with IRD, and hope, if not for marriage, than a little more hot s*x during this not-so-hot summer before I get back to the arduous task of searching for a husband.
Ill-advised? Perhaps. Annoying? Oui. But enough fun to make up for it?. One can only hope.
Even more ill-advised than a fling with IRD is the upcoming United Nations backpacking trip, which I will take with IRD (who is British), his Russian (guy) friend, and South African Boy.
Me and three cute foreign boys on a backpacking trip. Heh heh. Two of who are vying for my attention. Heh heh. I mean, could get very messy.
Not to mention, I still have to break the news to CGLB about his (lack of) sex drive without completely destroying his manhood. Because though you may not realize it, I am a nice person!! Not a callous b*tch who just thows men overboard because they don't know how to kiss!!!
Ahem. As you can see, life is tres complicated at the moment. Not exactly what I want. But could be much, much worse, no? Anyway, according to my horoscope the period from June 16 to July 4 is the best time for romance all year. So I'm just going to enjoy it before it all goes downhill.
Three men + three nights in wilderness = lots of fun for Breakup Babe. Hmm, except for the lack of showers...
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